4am But WTF?

I’ve been trying to understand how it is that I’ve been waking up at 4am everyday, yet it seems like so little is getting accomplished.

I know what it is. I keep screwing things up. I think I’ve set the record for the amount of mistakes made in book publishing. Getting this book up to par has been too much. I’ve thought about pulling my hair out, literally. I thought about cutting all my dreads off just to save time in the shower. I’m also going broke having to upload new “corrected” files every time I find my mistakes, but there’s nothing I can do about that–except stop making mistakes!

I’ll try to focus on some of the good stuff. Let’s start there.

1. I got that proof from the Denver binder place and I love how it looks. Very professional job. They are going to be binding my special edition of the book in a kind of khaki beige starched linen and stamp the title on the spine in red foil. Slick and classy. I really like how it looks. If only I had given the printer the right files. They were all facing the opposite way (right page facing to the left) and so I cried wee wee wee all the way home. Shit. Oh well. At least now they are correct and being reprinted. They will be at the Denver binder any day.

2. All the good editorial reviews I have so far were collected to print on the back side of the perfect-bound paperback and the case-bound hardcover. I got the first proof of that today! I put a RUSH job on it. Good thing I did because it was slightly out of whack and I missed a typo on one of the reviews. I swear, I must’ve read that thing 50 times before I uploaded the file. Then, with fresh new eyes, it stood out like a monkey wearing a glitter suit in a snow bank. How could I miss it? The new file is now being reprinted. Moving on.

3. I ordered a RUSH job on the hardcovers too and will be getting a proof on Monday. Hopefully that one will look somewhat better. We shall see. But I have to assume it will also have a crooked spine like the paperback did. I don’t know. Maybe not. They were two different templates so it’s possible it will look alright and I’ll let the little typo go.

4. The Kindle edition is now available for pre-order on Amazon.

5. It looks like I’ll make the April 6th deadline after all since I’m paying for the more expensive “RUSH” turnaround times. I can’t do a book signing without books there, right? I have no other choice.

So I spent a day or two correcting files, but what else have I done? I finished that one painting I mentioned last time, and am still frazzled about finishing all the rest of the art. I’ve been working on the largest oil painting in the early morning hours as much as I possibly can. Getting the hardest (biggest) one out of the way first is smart. And I’m observing my average energy levels, which aren’t too hot. I’m able to stand at the easel for a maximum or 45 minutes until a breaking point. This is with the aid of leaning half my weight on a chair for most of that time. I’ve had to balance on a step stool for a few seconds at a time too. The canvas is 60 inches high, so I have to stand for the top half of working on the painting at least. It’s based on the above sketch, more or less. It’s not necessarily a “hard” painting to do. It’s actually enjoyable, complaints and all.

After 45 minutes of painting, I have rest for 20 minutes to recuperate. This just pisses me off. Still. I still won’t get used to this. In my head, I’m still 28 and there is nothing wrong with me. But you know…I’m not 28 at all.

Anyway, that’s a whole other mental problem–about my physical problems. Ha ha.

I am more than half way done with the big painting. I feel accomplished. Today. I feel like it will only get easier from here. It can’t go any other way, can it?

In other news…and I do have other news, I will have to tell you later. I just can’t keep typing right now.

I’ll be back. Stay tuned. It’s all very exciting shit.

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