Yesterday I typed “over-inspired” into Google because that was how I was feeling. I wondered if anyone else in the world felt the same way. Much to my surprise, a bunch of articles came up. Not just from artists, but from people in all kinds of creative industries. Okay, so I’m not the only one out there. But what does that even mean anyway?
Above painting by Lisa Sanditz
Even with my brand new air conditioning unit in my studio, it just doesn’t seem to cut it in this extreme heat wave we’ve been having. Yesterday and today it’s well above 100 degrees and it’s not been fun. Yesterday I was nauseous and had a headache all day, and I tried to drink as much water as I could. I probably shouldn’t have been outside though. I had to drive to the San Fernando Valley, and that was just idiotic. By the time I got home, I’d already melted.
I haven’t smoked a cigarette in 18 days. You’d think I’d be proud of myself, but all I want is to smoke a cigarette. Still, I haven’t yet and I’m just getting by day by day so far. In fact, I have been pretty holed up in my house so I won’t go out and buy a pack. I’ve been doing that on purpose, but the other day I was able to go out and see the Eva Hesse movie with a few of my friends in Santa Monica.
I’m awake early this morning. I was having nightmares again. I have nightmares quite a lot actually. It’s the story of my life. I’m kind of used to them. This time I wasn’t able to go back to sleep though. My arm was being munched on by a giant coyote with the mouth the size of a crocodile, and my arm was still physically hurting after I woke up out of the dream for a good while. So weird. I woke myself up because I was calling out for my dad of all people. I guess he was the only person that I knew for sure had a shotgun. But he either never showed up, or I woke up before he could save me.
I just finished up this little ditty called Buzzard’s Roost. I guess it’s not that little though. It’s 24 x 24 inches:
