All right, so I spend a shit load of time making decisions. So what? These days, it’s a wonder I come to make any at all.
I feel good nowadays when I make a decision. I used to have two kinds of problems before.
Firstly, I used to make descions, but then I’d second guess them the entire time afterwards. Drove me NUTS!
2. I couldn’t make a decision at all. I mean, not to save my life!
I’d fall into some sort of anxiety-ridden hell hole of self-deprecation and head-crushing confusion. And that was so hard to crawl out from.
And still, no decision was never made. (Woamp, woam) <– That’s that stupid music that plays when you don’t get your way. “Loser music!”
Nowadays, I take my time. I make up my mind and I commit to it. If it’s “wrong,” so what? It’s not the end of the world. Or is it? Ahhhhh!
I have decided to stop hoarding the work I have been doing. I feel I should share it. I mean, why hoard it? That’s stupid.
But when would I reveal it? At what opportunity? When will that come? Maybe never. So what the fuck?
I think I was afraid of someone or something coming along and bursting my bubble. I’m really happy with the work I’ve been doing lately, but I’ve been mentally fragile. Knowing this, I’ve been afraid to share my art because it’s the only thing (that is, besides mjp) that is making my life worth living and making me happy, and making me confident.
So, if I’m confident about it. That’s that. If someone wants to come along and shit on it, let them try. I’m probably a lot stronger than I think.
The new “body of work” actually starts at the end of last year, starting with Held by Sheer Willingness. It got a bad review in an art forum I belong to, but so what? It threw me off course a bit, but when it came down to it, I still really love this crazy painting.
The next one:
And then the focus started to get really honed in with Runaway Box, one of my favorites:
After that, I had some kind of breakthrough and painted my first piece of 2013:
In a recent post I spoke about how some of the new pieces have been coming to me. But a new discovery shows that I did not draw the next one in my drumset sketchbook like I thought I did. I dreamed I did! I just looked through so I could post the first preliminary sketch, and while there are a few similar drawings in there that I drew before I fell asleep that very night I thought I drew it, that one isn’t there. I suppose that is why I drew it again (well, not again) in Photoshop when I returned home.
It’s the first one that I happened to finish on those six panels that I prepped last month:
Read about what a Spin-flip is here.
And here is a pic of that sketchbook and a pic of the sketch for the pink painting at least:
The second one is called The Sander. Here is the preliminary sketch:
And here is the painting:
Now I am finishing up the third and fourth one and I’ll post them soon. Not so easy to draw them on the panels exactly the way you had them in your sketchbook, but I’m doing my best.
See ya soon!